If you met me in person, you probably wouldn’t notice the sweet scar I have across my neck.
It’s a little memento I have from an operation I had years ago to remove half of my thyroid.
I’ve been managing just fine with a daily hormone supplement, adjusting my dosage every now and again to ensure that my body used energy at the proper rate and didn’t, you know, malfunction.
That is, until now.
For whatever reason, my thyroid levels are refusing to stabilize and it’s become particularly problematic these past several weeks as I’ve suffered from severe fatigue, some dizziness and elevated heart rates all day, every day.
I don’t have all the answers yet, but I do know that I need to take some time to focus on my thyroid and adrenal issues, and that recovery involves a combination of medication, supplements, diet, lots of rest, and a serious look at how I manage my stress.
It could take months until I feel like myself again.
My Pity Party
I admit it. I totally moped around for a few days. I ate a cheeseburger and french fries (not worth it), breakfast sandwiches and pasta (also not worth it), and these delicious cookie thingies (100% worth it).
I tossed and turned in bed in an effort to rest, only to stew on all of the things I should have done and, for that matter, need to do.
I felt silly for thinking I had it all figured out with all the meticulous work I put into diet, fitness, sleep and stress management this past year, and finally concluded that all of this self imposed pressure to do and eat and think about all of the right things was stress in and of itself.
Thankfully, my pity party was short lived. I’m not going to beat myself up over should haves and could haves. I’m not going to feel sorry for myself and eat junk food for no reason or complain about how tired I am. It’s not productive.
The bottom line is, I’m going to be just fine. I get to recover. And when I do, I’ll get back to the crazy and cool monthly challenges that I truly love doing.
The present moment, however, calls for a little break. One that doesn’t involve any challenges or rules. One that permits me to sleep in, take naps, read lots of books and chill out.
Maybe I’ll go to Yoga or sign up for those guitar lessons. Maybe I’ll bang on the piano or write a silly poem or a short story about a little girl and a magic wand.
Or maybe I won’t.
Sounds pretty great doesn’t it?